If you have been following my instagram stories or Social media you’ve seen I’ve recently talked about going ‘dry.’ You know giving alcohol a bit of a break in my life.

I feel the need right away to apologize to every mom who I’ve ever worked with or has ever followed me over the years in being a member of society that has helped create a stigma around drinking. Open any social media outlet or Pinterest and every mom meme is something related to drinking.

“Kids were crazy today –Mom pours a glass of wine.”

“Husband is gone for the week or working late —moms we are allowed to pour a glass of wine.”

“I survived bedtime —moms pour a glass of wine.”

There’s a million and I’m thinking back to my last five years as a health & life coach showing my following of moms that when times get stressful the best answer is a glass of Pinot Noir.

That a glass of wine is the BEST way to be a Selfish Mom. I cringe literally thinking that I have some how contributed to this epidemic of society.

Before you think I am sitting on some high horse shaking my finger at everyone with a glass of wine in my hand – I promise you I am not. I love wine, but I need a break. Since Max has been born I’ve been loving it way to much. I started to let my wine become my afternoon crutch because that was the moment in my day where I felt the most alone and overwhelmed. Three kids is hard for me, not to mention homework from my fourth-grader that most days I myself don’t understand, a middle child that wants to wear my like last years Versace and a baby that wants to be much older than he actually is. I was straight up overwhelmed and exhausted. My overwhelmed had reached a serious max last week when I walked into my seventh weekend of yoga teacher training, holding back my tears and emotions.

That morning before I went to yoga I had opened up a new book called Sober Curious. I decided I would read the book, see how I felt about it, and maybe MAYBE (a big maybe!) decide if it was for me. Walking into yoga that weekend we worked with a licensed therapist on all things Chakras. This was in no way what I thought it was going to be. Imagine 15 hours (plus the deep heaviness that awaited when you came home with your thoughts) of therapy. In my heart I feel really knew then that this book and this wonderful woman came into my life on the exact weekend from the big guy upstairs. It was time to make a change.

Rounding up my first week with absolutely no alcohol I can tell you honestly has not been easy. When society presents everything emotion you can possibly have with a reason to drink you’re left to really sit back and feel those emotions instead of pushing them under the rug.

Overwhelm is a HUGE emotion that I think most if not all mom’s struggle with. As a health and life coach of MOMS I should know this! If I’m masking this emotion with wine how many other moms out there are as well?!

If you have read this far you might be wondering if I’ll ever have a drink again. Right now I think my answer is yes. My main goal is to release this crutch I’ve created and change my relationship for me right now I do not believe that means never having a drink again. Who knows though! I’ve never felt physically better than I do right now, and my mental clarity feels pretty darn good too.

WHAT I do know is a couple things…

1. I’m putting no rules on myself. I already know what it feels like to try and attempt my own way at ‘curing’ overwhelm with a couple glasses of wine, what I don’t know is actually going through the motions and feeling through it and maybe even changing up that after noon stress a bit. But no I can’t give you any number of days. I’m simply working on changing a stigma-reward-stress releasier-relationship I’ve placed up on myself.

2. This is an opportunity for growth and y’all know me, I love a good self care project. I’ve been reading and journaling like its my full time job and its amazing what ideas and work can come to your mind when you head is completely clear ready for spirit to come and do its work.

3. I’m not scared for change, I’m excited. I’ve been doing so much prayer work the last couple years for God to bring amazing people in my life that made me feel good, authentic and lift me up and this year I have really noticed that happening. I’m at total peace with a shift in friendships.

4. I’m even more excited to dive into my work of helping moms BUT this time with a different, fresh, clear, perspective for where my clients really need to go. I’m already in the process of writing TWO new courses that I hope to have out to the public by the end of this month and next and some other goodies up my sleeve.

As always thanks for reading, or maybe today thanks for listening to my heart getting the opportunity to share its truth. We all have a crutch to work on or release. Like always my heart, home, ear, inbox is always open for you.