(Before you read this post let me be clear that there are plenty of people who have known me for a very long time and very well and this is not something I talk about freely. I am always open to talk about it and questions about what happened. I just ask that you please read the book first.)
Its not every day someone writes a book about your life. It’s also not everyday that said book is bought by Lifetime and then a TV movie is made about it. Exciting right?
Well yes and no.
Seventeen years ago something horrible happened in my family and by the grace of God my family not only stayed together but none of us were physically harmed or removed. The emotional baggage however has taken its toll on all of us in different ways (PTSD is a real thing), but over time you forget and move on. Until it all comes back to surface and your left facing it head on realizing you didn’t exactly heal from it rather you simply pushed it aside and decided not to think about it anymore.
My wonderful mother Kathie Truitt, wrote the book False Victim years ago. I read the book ten years ago when it first came out on a vacation in Italy. There was a lot going on and I didn’t totally process the entire book I’ll be honest. I thought the book was an amazing read, but my mind was on other things and so I didn’t take the time to actually process what was going on in the book and that it was actually my character in there. Hint, I’m pretty good at pushing things to the back of my brain and forget about them, I’m a work in progress because this is not something I recommend because it is not a healthy way to process trauma.
Recently my mom re-released False Victim with a new publisher, started going on book tour again, and doing book clubs. Still didn’t really seem to effect me in anyway until Lifetime called asking to buy the rights to the book and turn it into a tv movie. I signed my name on the dotted line and agreed to whatever they asked me to in the contract. My mom was invited to go to Vancouver to watch the filming of movie and asked my dad and I to step in for her at a local book club.
Public Speaking is my jam so obviously I was happy to do it, but I didn’t realize what it would bring up for me and my lack of healing process that I personally needed to go through. The day of the event I was a grumpy mess. My husband couldn’t push me out of the house fast enough that night because of my attitude. I started the day being nervous about it and with flashbacks that I hadn’t had in years. My husband, who has never read the book due to personal decisions, asked me a couple questions about what happened that set me off, gave me horrible flashback moments, and made me go down a horrible google and social media rabbit hole that I hadn’t gone down in at least ten years. I had to stop myself.
I was 16 and my brother was 6 when the hell started. Though the book puts a shorter timeline on what happened, it actually lasted for years. After I went to college and even when I came back home. I never spoke out about it then and until now I haven’t really spoken about it unless asked to. But the other night when I was at the book club and someone asked about the seriousness of the allegations placed on my family I finally understood the magnitude of them. Because now I am a mother.
My brother was a cute little six year old blonde haired boy. I now too have a cute little blonde haired six year old boy that looks and acts just like that little boy I tried with everything in me to protect 17 years ago. I had never made that connection until the other night and I’d be lying if I said it didn’t keep me up a couple nights the last week. To think of something happening and threatening my family, my children, to the capacity that my mom and our family had to go through literally makes me sick to my stomach.
I used to say to people, “If you ever want to know why I am the way that I am – read this book.”
I WILL NEVER SAY THIS AGAIN.
My mom is an amazing writer and this is one of those books that you will not put down and you will read in a day because its THAT good. BUT I will never give the woman that did this to my family that much credit for my life ever again. I am the way I am because my parents raised me to be loving and kind, to put God first and to always practice forgiveness.
The book club, though unexpectedly so, was a huge healing moment for me that I didn’t realize I needed. Maybe even more so getting the opportunity to do it alongside of my dad. To give our perspectives, our stories and speak freely was truly a gift of healing that was unexpected and I didn’t realize I needed.
I’ll pass on more information as it comes about how you can watch the Lifetime movie airing in February. I can tell you that they decided to cut my character out of the movie, lol. We are currently making this a great family joke and I have every intention of wearing a sheet over my head at thanksgiving dinner and pretending like I don’t even exist. Even in the midst of everything we have a great sense of humor in our family.
Please go buy this book and read it and post all your questions and comments below or send me an email and I’ll answer everything you need to know! After you read the book I promise you I’m an open book! Remember that healing comes at different moments but comes when you open yourself up and allow it flow freely.
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